Dairy Queen is closing. That doesnt really affect me because I don't live in Bracebridge, and I don't spend a whole lot of time here out side of school. In fact before I started going to St. Dom's, I had only been to Bracebridge 4 times in my life. Twice to sign up for St. Dom's, and twice to the beer store when the one in Gravenhurst was closed. I still don't come to Bracebridge that ofter because it's like a 45 minute drive from my house. See, I live in the middle of nowhere. 1185 Middle of Effing Nowhere, thats my address. Or thats what I told my parents when I was 11 and this place was still my cottage. Apparently I was an adorable child.
I do like Dairy Queen, though. The Blizzard makes my life complete. Cookie Dough, French Silk, Brownie Batter, CheeseQuake, Reese's Pieces, Oreo. SO Good. And Dilly Bars (I think thats what those things are called). DQ Cakes. DQ Sandwich. Buster Bar. MooLatte. Brownie Explosion. Its all so good. Millions of calories packed into a plastic cup, with chocolately goodness.
Yum.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
At the end of this year I don't know what I am going to do. As all of my friends go off to college and university, or to work I still haven't decided. I know my father would be thrilled if I signed up for Nipissing or Georgian because they are schools that are nice and close to home; he hasn't seemed to realize that he doesn't have a snowball's chance in hell of making me stay in Muskoka past graduation. I did not want to come here in the first place, I do not want to be here and I sure don't plan on delaying my inevitable departure. But I haven't told him that I don't think I want to go to school next year. Not that I don't ever want to go to college or university, but realistically I am an extremely lazy teenager with almost no motivation for school work. I have a work ethic, I do well at work and I learn fast but when it comes to school I just don't seem to have the effort. I can't seem to will myself to do the work. I sit down at my computer with no programs open but Microsoft word, nothing around me, my iPod safely in my bedroom, and I begin. I will begin to type, anywhere from the first sentence to the first page. If I am lucky my concentration will last for the whole assignment but I am rarely that lucky. Normally, something I type will remind me of something I once read in a book (I've read a lot of books), or something that a friend was talking about, or something I meant to tell my sister for her english paper, or something that my brother asked me about, or something I watched on TV or in a Movie... It goes on and on.
It's not that I don't realize that I'm only screwing myself over. I fully realize that with my grades I will never be accepted to any school, for anything. I know that I need to go to college or university in order to make something of myself. I know that I can't work at Boston Pizza for the rest of my life if I intend to afford my lifestyle. I know that everyday I miss is another day I will be back at school. I know I'm a spoiled brat who is taking the wonderful oppurtunities provided to her for granted. I do realize these things. I just can't seem to care. It's not even that, I don't think. I do care what happens to me, and about school and grades and college. I'm amazingly lazy. I don't know where my work ethic has gone because believe it or not, I used to have one. I used to hand assignments in early, and would never dream of missing a homework question. I have a good mind, and I'm sure I have some talent. It seems that I'm old enough to know better, but young enough not to care.
I have a plan though, that I've been formulating over the past few weeks. I haven't figured out the logistics of it, but I'm thinking of going on a sort of missions trip next year. There are many organizations I'm looking at, and I think it would be good for me. I think that spending a few months helping out kids from broken families in impoverished countries might make me get my act together and appreciate what I have. But that's not the only reason I am going. That's not even the main reason. I want to go and help people. I like helping people, and I want to experience another culture. One of the organizations, Canada World Youth, offers a 6 month program that involves you and a partner from another country being paired up as part of a larger team. The first 3 months is spent in a part of Canada that you don't live in, where you help disadvantaged Canadians. The second half of the program is spent in your partner's home country, where yu help our some of their fellow citizens who are impoverished. I need to research it more, but I think that one of the programs could be a good thing for me, and solve my dilemma of what to do next year.
It's not that I don't realize that I'm only screwing myself over. I fully realize that with my grades I will never be accepted to any school, for anything. I know that I need to go to college or university in order to make something of myself. I know that I can't work at Boston Pizza for the rest of my life if I intend to afford my lifestyle. I know that everyday I miss is another day I will be back at school. I know I'm a spoiled brat who is taking the wonderful oppurtunities provided to her for granted. I do realize these things. I just can't seem to care. It's not even that, I don't think. I do care what happens to me, and about school and grades and college. I'm amazingly lazy. I don't know where my work ethic has gone because believe it or not, I used to have one. I used to hand assignments in early, and would never dream of missing a homework question. I have a good mind, and I'm sure I have some talent. It seems that I'm old enough to know better, but young enough not to care.
I have a plan though, that I've been formulating over the past few weeks. I haven't figured out the logistics of it, but I'm thinking of going on a sort of missions trip next year. There are many organizations I'm looking at, and I think it would be good for me. I think that spending a few months helping out kids from broken families in impoverished countries might make me get my act together and appreciate what I have. But that's not the only reason I am going. That's not even the main reason. I want to go and help people. I like helping people, and I want to experience another culture. One of the organizations, Canada World Youth, offers a 6 month program that involves you and a partner from another country being paired up as part of a larger team. The first 3 months is spent in a part of Canada that you don't live in, where you help disadvantaged Canadians. The second half of the program is spent in your partner's home country, where yu help our some of their fellow citizens who are impoverished. I need to research it more, but I think that one of the programs could be a good thing for me, and solve my dilemma of what to do next year.
Monday, November 3, 2008
It has taken the recent chill in the air for me to realize that summer is finally gone. It was my last carefree summer, too. It makes me a little sad that after this year I can't really freeload off of my parents any more. Well, I suppose to could but it would be kind of pathetic. By the time graduation rolls around, I'll have just turned 18. If I graduate on time, which is still up in the air at the moment.
It makes me angry that I wasted my last free summer working. Not that summer work is bad, but I worked too much. I saw my godson twice, my old friends maybe 3 or 4 times and my current group of friends on the few weekends that I came home. Strangely enough, I saw more of my sister's friends than I did my own. My day basically went like this: wake up around 7, get to work around 8:30, work until 3-5, get home about 30 minutes after that, wait for my mother to leave so I could have a smoke, and then I would go out with my sister.
It's odd that I spent the summer hanging out with my sister, because she's three years older than me and we were never very close when she lived at home. We fought like sisters do, becuase I'd steal her clothes and she would treat me badly. I guess we got along okay the last year we lived together, when I was in grade nine, but that was more of a mutual alliance; I'd keep her secrets so long as she kept mine. Between Meagan, my cousin Kyle and myself, we would band together to make sure there was always some one at home to take the attendance call from the school, and that we got the early warning letters before my grandma and that we always had an alibi if we were spotted somewhere that we shouldn't be. Life was good, but we weren't close by any stretch of the imagination. Our daily screaming matches were cut down to two or three times a week and the other 4 days we were allies, but not really friends.
Which is why i'm now flabbergasted as I realize that i spent the majority of my summer with my sister. We ate breakfast and lunch together everyday becuase she worked in the office across the complex. We often ate dinner at my grandma's house (because you don't turn down a free meal, especially when it includes home made cinnamon rolls for dessert) and then we would go out for hours together afterwards. Its an easy friendship. I'm just not sure how it came about.
It makes me angry that I wasted my last free summer working. Not that summer work is bad, but I worked too much. I saw my godson twice, my old friends maybe 3 or 4 times and my current group of friends on the few weekends that I came home. Strangely enough, I saw more of my sister's friends than I did my own. My day basically went like this: wake up around 7, get to work around 8:30, work until 3-5, get home about 30 minutes after that, wait for my mother to leave so I could have a smoke, and then I would go out with my sister.
It's odd that I spent the summer hanging out with my sister, because she's three years older than me and we were never very close when she lived at home. We fought like sisters do, becuase I'd steal her clothes and she would treat me badly. I guess we got along okay the last year we lived together, when I was in grade nine, but that was more of a mutual alliance; I'd keep her secrets so long as she kept mine. Between Meagan, my cousin Kyle and myself, we would band together to make sure there was always some one at home to take the attendance call from the school, and that we got the early warning letters before my grandma and that we always had an alibi if we were spotted somewhere that we shouldn't be. Life was good, but we weren't close by any stretch of the imagination. Our daily screaming matches were cut down to two or three times a week and the other 4 days we were allies, but not really friends.
Which is why i'm now flabbergasted as I realize that i spent the majority of my summer with my sister. We ate breakfast and lunch together everyday becuase she worked in the office across the complex. We often ate dinner at my grandma's house (because you don't turn down a free meal, especially when it includes home made cinnamon rolls for dessert) and then we would go out for hours together afterwards. Its an easy friendship. I'm just not sure how it came about.
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